The Extras
A few ideas to enhance your ceremony! Many people don’t think about the ‘add-ons’ to their ceremony, and they are often the things that make it extra special. I can offer a wealth of ideas, but here’s a few of them. Whilst these are mostly designed for weddings and commitment ceremonies, many of them can be adapted for vow renewals, namings, and transition ceremonies.
Before we start
Seating
Always pay careful attention to where people are going to be seated. Anyone taking part in the ceremony should have ‘reserved’ seats with easy access & return so as not to disrupt others when they move in and out of their seats. This is one of the things I make sure works perfectly, during the rehearsal.
Microphones
You may think that you won’t need a microphone when you say your vows, but think of others who you’re asking to take part. Are their voices quieter? Will they be nervous? You may need mics just for them.Sightlines
Not just for your guests, but also for your photographer. I’ll take all that into consideration and brief your photographer & videographer on the best places to stand at key moments in the ceremony.Music
Many couple have music that is special to them and want to include it in the ceremony. Make sure to time your music moments and edit /fade the tracks properly to make sure everything flows seamlessly with no awkward moments.Secret Ring Bearer
Place your boxed wedding rings underneath one of the guests’ seats, so that they’re out of sight as they sit down. We’ll stage a little ‘who’s got the rings?’ moment and one of your guests will become the spontaneous ring bearer! Of course, you can always make sure it’s placed under the reserved seat of a guest of your choice – just keep it a secret!Certificate table
Make sure your certificate table is positioned so that it’ll look great in your photographs. Dress it properly and think about what’s behind it – you don’t want exit signs or a scuffed wall to take pride of place in the photos!The procession
Think about the order in which you all enter the ceremony once the guests are seated. Can we thank mums & dads/grandparents before we start, and have them walk in together first? That always gets a round of applause and a few tears.
And Groom – you can make your own grand appearance and walk, or even dance, down the aisle just before the bridal party; alone, with your Best Man, or even with your dog as ring bearer! It’s even better if you do it to music that means something to you.
Think about how comfortable your guests will be during the ceremony. Bridesmaids and groomsmen don’t have to sit in the front rows if their children & families are a few rows back. It may lessen noise and disruption during the ceremony if they all have reserved seats together.
The ceremony
Add a symbolic ritual or two, to make the ceremony extra special and involve close family members or friends. I have many ideas up my sleeve – but here are a few examples of the most popular ones:
Handfasting (‘Tying the knot’)
One of the oldest known unity ceremonies, handfasting is the joining of the bride and groom’s hands and wrists using cord or ribbons tied into an infinity knot. It’s said that this is where we get the expression “tying the knot”, and it usually takes place towards the end of the wedding ceremony as a final promise to bind your lives together.
You can do it with just two ribbons representing yourselves, or involve chosen loved ones to come forward with different coloured ribbons to place over your clasped hands. The ribbons then become a lifelong keepsake. I’ve done this with as many as twelve different members of a newly-blended family and it was an emotional highlight of the wedding.
This is also a lovely ritual to incorporate into a vow renewal or a naming/transition ceremony to show how the family are all united together.
Sand ceremony
A sand ceremony is where you both take different coloured sand from separate vessels and combine the grains into one clear glass – representing the joining of two individuals and the creation of a new union. This is a particularly lovely way to involve children when you are blending families; each of them would have their own coloured sand, making the final result all the more poignant.
Ring Warming
The ring warming ceremony has its origins in Irish tradition. At an appropriate moment, your wedding rings are passed to the guests (usually in their ring box or pouch), who each spend a moment holding them whilst imbuing their best wishes and blessings on you both. By the time they get back to the ring bearer, they are thoroughly warmed – literally and metaphorically!
Alternatively, you may wish to incorporate this ritual, but shorten it by only asking your closest family and friends, or those involved with the ceremony, to take part.
Anniversary/Memory Box
Invite all your guests to bring something that has a personal meaning to you: a written anecdote, song lyrics, a photograph, or even a small, inexpensive gift that will resonate with you about your relationship to them and why you’ve invited them to be part of your big day.
We’ll have a keepsake box ready for them all to place their items in and I’ll refer to it during the ceremony. You can open it soon afterwards, or leave it for your first anniversary as a reminder of everyone who was there celebrating with you. You can even add to it over the years, continuing to make extra special memories.
Live music
If you have any talented musicians as wedding guests, it’s particularly special to ask them to sing or play during the ceremony – especially during the signing of the certificate. Even better if you can encourage other guests to join in as a surprise to everyone!
The recessional
If you have children, it’s a perfect photo opportunity to ask them to join you in the recessional. I’ll brief the photographer beforehand, making sure they’re in place to get the perfect shot.
Music
Think about the music you want to exit to – plan for something personal, with a crescendo we can build up to. And don’t just walk out – dance, wave, whoop, celebrate! Don’t forget to tag another track on immediately afterwards, so that guests aren’t left in silence as they take their time to leave. I’ll help you edit your music to get it just right.
Plan your special day
Please email me for an informal chat to see if we are the right match. If we are, I would love to work with you!
Contact
Email: [email protected]
